Somewhere then
I lost my now
I lost my future, past and pow

Ticking clocks and smoking blocks
Because its not suppose to be
because its not suppose to be
or so he said, or so she said

Zing zang, twing twang,
the clock strikes...

1
2
3
Go

tick tock tick tock

1
2
3
Go



Times a ticking, maybe a little bit to fast for me.

We might not even have time for a final act.

Musicians

So this weekend was Osheaga. I didnt go, I did go to the after party though. Dont ask how.

Anyway we arrive and there is a line. fuck. And then I see Haley who for some reason is working the guest list. I talk to her for a bit and then we go and wait in line.
A few minutes later she comes over and tells us "the bouncer says I can let you guys in".
Sweeeeet. We get to skip the line!

We get in and find our table. yes we had a table and a bottle of grey goose. Thanks to Matt and Mike and co.
And next to us is Interpol and Bloc Party.

um lots of things happen.

M.I.A. does a mini performance and the main singer from Bloc Party jumps on stage and starts singing with her.

The best part was though when I DANCED WITH THE SINGER AND DRUMMER (MATT TONG...who I have a big crush on) FROM BLOC PARTY!!!

They were semi doing the robot and it was hilariously awesome.

I love Matt tong.
Later I told him he was absolutely awesome and he said thanks, shook my hand and other things were said that I dont remember.

For a sunday it was absolutely unbelievable.

bad timing really likes me

I dont have a fucking STI.

Apparently ppl think this. THANKS ASSHOLES

It could go either way right now.
But I have a bad feeling about it.

Of course this would happen. Of course.

A call.

The call.

The answer, the reason, the why. The thing I was looking for.
As if I knew it was to happen, as if I knew it was going to happen before you knew. Before anyone knew.

Only time will tell now.

Time, that isnt even on my side.
I dont have ages. I have seconds, I have minutes, I have hours, I have days, I have weeks, I have months, I have years.
But who knows when. There is no exact anything for anyone or anything and everything. It just is and it just happens.




And I'm ok with that.

Those who think it is permissible to tell white lies soon grow color-blind. ~Austin O'Malley

The only thing worse than a liar is a liar that's also a hypocrite! - Tennessee Williams

“Happiness and joy always eludes a hypocrite." - Sam Veda

“Love is not written on paper, for paper can be erased. Nor is it etched on stone, for stone can be broken. But it is inscribed on a heart and there it shall remain forever.”

“The heart has reasons that reason does not understand.” -Jacques Benigne Bossuel

“But some emotions don't make a lot of noise. It's hard to hear pride. Caring is real faint - like a heartbeat. And pure love - why, some say it's so quiet, you don't even know it's there.”

“To the world you may be just one person, but to one person you may be the world.” -Brandi Snyder

“Though we drifted apart in distance I still think of you as being right here. And although we have many new friends, it is our friendship that means the most to me.”

“Trust your hunches.... Hunches are usually based on facts filed away just below the conscious level.” -Dr. Joyce Brothers

"Never apologize for showing feeling. When you do so, you apologize for the truth" -Benjamin Disraeli

"I'd rather you hate me for telling you the truth, than adore me for telling you lies"

"There are reasons we met, reasons for the good and bad times, and more importantly a reason to end. "

Its time to realize that you cant always fix everything to your liking, and that time doesnt heal all wounds.

& this whole thing can go down as my first real, full out regret.


Remember to bury me somewhere nice

" A lie may take care of the present, but it has no future." ~Author Unknown

“The liar's punishment is not in the least that he is not believed, but that he cannot believe anyone else.”
~George Bernard Shaw

“A liar will not be believed, even when he speaks the truth.”~Aesop

“No man has a good enough memory to be a successful liar.”~Abraham Lincoln

"We tell lies when we are afraid... afraid of what we don't know, afraid of what others will think, afraid of what will be found out about us. But every time we tell a lie, the thing that we fear grows stronger." ~Tad Williams

“A man is never more truthful than when he acknowledges himself as a liar” ~Mark Twain

If you’re so funny, then why are you on your own tonight?
And if you’re so clever then why are you on your own tonight?
And if you’re so very entertaining then why are you on your own tonight?
And if you’re so very good looking, then why do you sleep alone tonight?
I know - ’cos tonight is just like any other night - that’s why you’re on
Your own tonight
With your triumphs and your charms - while they’re in each other’s arms
It’s so easy to laugh it’s so easy to hate it takes strength to be gentle
And kind - over and over....
It’s so easy to laugh it’s so easy to hate it takes guts to be gentle and
Kind - over and over....
Love is natural and real - but not for you my love not tonight my love
Love is natural and real - but not for such as you and I my love

My mind is triumphing my feelings for a change.
With it comes the sad realization of how stupid I've been.
But I know for certain I'm worth a lot & I deserve a lot more too.


I cant wait to leave